I Just Need Some Clarity

I am really confused. I understand that everyone needs their own space and time for themselves. I feel like I have given you that since you have brought it up to me. I am not unreasonable because I have listened to your need and accommodated to it. However, you still want more space and time apart. It really breaks my heart to have to spend more time apart because I don't see why I need to. I don't see why I have to be so far away from you even though I can be with you within 10 minutes. Whereas in Santa Barbara, I couldn't really see you at all. But you don't even want to see me like you want to see your friends. I get that friends are one thing. You need friends, and to spend time with them. But they're not even amazing. Regardless, whether they're nice to you or not, you don't even see me as any where near a priority as you do them. I'm not asking to be first priority, and the only one. However, it seems to me that they come first. Whether you are tired or dislike being in crowds, you are willing to put out that time to go see your friends. However, when I want to do something, i.e., Aquarium of the Pacific, or anything that I would like to do, it's pushed to the side. I don't like to be selfish, but I want to be selfish because I don't feel like I am getting much out of this relationship. I know it is better than what I have had before/haven't ever had, but I don't think that it needs to be this lopsided. I don't want to keep bringing it up because it's not a fun thing to talk about, but it really bothers me a lot and constantly. I would like to be at least of equal priority to your friends. So that at the very least, you are tired or don't like to do certain things, but you still do it anyway because you want to spend time with me. But, as of now, it doesn't seem like you like  me enough to want to do things for me. There is no sacrifice. I know you say you like me a lot or "too much," but feelings are fleeting. How can I know that you like me if I can't see it? You are willing to sacrifice or do things for your friends, but not me, your girlfriend. I am not sure what I am as a girlfriend to you, or what girlfriend means to you right now. I am not sure I would even count as a girlfriend. I am not sure I would count as your best friend, and most, I am not sure I would even count as your friend because I know you wouldn't treat your friends like so.

So do I just continue and give you time? Pretend like nothing's wrong? I don't feel patient enough because my feelings are bothering me. I want to just be happy. I just want to spend time with you, and just to be wanted. I am not too sure I can be given this right now. Sadly.