Worthless


Ahhh >.< I'm sucha selfish person. I only think of myself. I can't think of others....I cry for my own self....I can't do no shitt to help my love. I'm so fuckin worthless >.<

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add on at 4:44 p.m.

While on the car ride home from the Westminster Civic Center for the College Fair, I was thinking things through [again]. I was wrong. I am sorry. I am so frickin emotional these days, I wish I could just like stop crying sooo much >.<. I cry, but somehow it annoys ME that I cry so so much. I thought wrong....I thought I knew what really happened to my baby oreo....or so my mind made me imagine what could have happened? I wish all the bad stuff....like the jealousy, selfishness, worthlessness, and cry baby in me would just go away...forever; Literally! I hate having those...they bring me down, when I wanna be a good/kind person that's strong and such. I just learned a lot today from the College Fair, even though I'm just a freshmen, I wanna be as prepared as possible for college. So I learned a lot today...I also have a new goal/passion. I wanna help out Vietnamese Club....cause I'm already so dedicated I want to run for something next year. I thought about secretary or president. I don't know which to run for though. Secretary is easier, but I like being top &making things happen my way, which means being a president. However, you guys know I can be shy &moreover, I can't always be straightforward...so that's going to be something I need to improve in if I wanna be president. Let's just see how it turns out by the end of the year when the elections for the club start.

Well.....that was fun. I got back to school &decided to call my baby oreo cause I was like all alone there waiting for my dad to come pick me up. He was eating though so didn't really talk....my dad picked me up, went home, ate, and then he called back :]. We were talking happily and you see what I mean when I say I cause the pain/sadness in the convos? I told him I felt bad and such &I was sorry for what I did/thought...I didn't wanna think bad thoughts, it just comes to my mind...I can't help it >.< I really did wish it would stop soo much. So I ended up CRYING AGAIN....fudgicles right? I can't stop crying...like literally....it's like automatic faucet...geez >.<. Well....everything's okay now.


I love you forever &always.
I'm sorry.

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