Blocking it. New Attitude.
Hii! :O omgosh, guess what? I survived yesterday without talking to him :] I like that, but I missed him alot too. We did get to talk, but barely. Hah, I think I should give nicknames to these "hims" and "hers" now. I missed "him" &that would b, my oreo :]....you know who you r. Anyway, I wasn't on AIM that late yesterday cause I was busy re-thinking things &tryin to make myself feel better. I did feel better because I realized whenever people or friends ask me for help/advice/comfort on "relationship" type issues, I would tell them to keep fighting for the one they love, not literally to punch the other person out XD, but if you really find them special....you shouldn't give up on them.
&I thought...HEY o.o....why am I thinking of giving up the one I love right now, even if I have a friend that maybe likes/loves him too? I mean, you can't stop someone from having a special feeling for that one, so I shouldn't be stopping myself from what I really feel &that I shouldn't lie to myself sayin that I don't love him...because I fell too deep now &I really do love him. So yea, I'm gonna be strong &be good to myself since I need to be happy too...I don't always need to please my friends &family. I still will try to make ppl around me happy :] but giving myself time too. &if you're reading this, hopefully you'll think like this too? Haha, it's ok if u don't. Anyway back to topic XD.
I also realized that there was sooo many times when I've lost that someone special to me, &you no...it hurts even to this day. Friends tell me, "Forget about the past and move on." Yeah you should forget the past, but without it...there is no future &so I'm tryin to learn to live the past&present, forget the pain of the past, but remember it enough so I can learn from it &look back at it without having it get to me. I really don't know about my future or even what I want to be when I'm older...but that's okay cuz time will lead me to all the answers. For now, I just know there's two very special guys in my heart, &my oreo is possibly winning &taking over my whole heart? I love that....but if I don't get him, I hope I won't be so hurt either.
Another thing ppl need to learn about me is that whenever I have or know someone/something good, I ALWAYS like to share it to the world. Haha, &maybe that's my problem how I end up losing ppl? Idunno. But, I'll continue sharing :] cuz if that right guy out there really loves me, nothing would happen that would separate us &he would be mine no matter what. lmfao, I sound so childish huh? Mayb, but it's true. What's yours, will be yours &what's not, will not be yours.
Sooooo I've made up my mind. I love my oreo &if he thinks I don't, I'm gonna have to ask,
"If I don't love you, why do you run through my mind 24/7 &in my sleep? Why would I take hrs just to write you something &post it where ALL my friends could see? and even write that in Vietnamese....which I totally suck at reading &writing even tho I am half Viet xD. And why would I do anything, even if it means I should give you up so that you're happy, just for you?" Hah, well I wrote alot, &if you read it till here you're fawking awesum<3>.< gunna go eat :] then at 3' 0clock heading to the block :] woot! catch me on myspace/AIM/facebook. byebyeees.
p.s. My oreo.....you really did steal my heart :] I think there's only one guy in my heart now. Ily
p.p.s. Thank you guys yesterday who tried cheering me up :] you guys r the bomb <3
p.p.p.s. Hey :] got new phone for like weeks since I killed my newish oldish one at the beach...anyway XD hit my up :] it's still the same numba &oh crap! something's wrong with my new phone! [say whattt??] It's just that, your numbers not in it :] haha so gimme some digits?
&I thought...HEY o.o....why am I thinking of giving up the one I love right now, even if I have a friend that maybe likes/loves him too? I mean, you can't stop someone from having a special feeling for that one, so I shouldn't be stopping myself from what I really feel &that I shouldn't lie to myself sayin that I don't love him...because I fell too deep now &I really do love him. So yea, I'm gonna be strong &be good to myself since I need to be happy too...I don't always need to please my friends &family. I still will try to make ppl around me happy :] but giving myself time too. &if you're reading this, hopefully you'll think like this too? Haha, it's ok if u don't. Anyway back to topic XD.
I also realized that there was sooo many times when I've lost that someone special to me, &you no...it hurts even to this day. Friends tell me, "Forget about the past and move on." Yeah you should forget the past, but without it...there is no future &so I'm tryin to learn to live the past&present, forget the pain of the past, but remember it enough so I can learn from it &look back at it without having it get to me. I really don't know about my future or even what I want to be when I'm older...but that's okay cuz time will lead me to all the answers. For now, I just know there's two very special guys in my heart, &my oreo is possibly winning &taking over my whole heart? I love that....but if I don't get him, I hope I won't be so hurt either.
Another thing ppl need to learn about me is that whenever I have or know someone/something good, I ALWAYS like to share it to the world. Haha, &maybe that's my problem how I end up losing ppl? Idunno. But, I'll continue sharing :] cuz if that right guy out there really loves me, nothing would happen that would separate us &he would be mine no matter what. lmfao, I sound so childish huh? Mayb, but it's true. What's yours, will be yours &what's not, will not be yours.
Sooooo I've made up my mind. I love my oreo &if he thinks I don't, I'm gonna have to ask,
"If I don't love you, why do you run through my mind 24/7 &in my sleep? Why would I take hrs just to write you something &post it where ALL my friends could see? and even write that in Vietnamese....which I totally suck at reading &writing even tho I am half Viet xD. And why would I do anything, even if it means I should give you up so that you're happy, just for you?" Hah, well I wrote alot, &if you read it till here you're fawking awesum<3>.< gunna go eat :] then at 3' 0clock heading to the block :] woot! catch me on myspace/AIM/facebook. byebyeees.
p.s. My oreo.....you really did steal my heart :] I think there's only one guy in my heart now. Ily
p.p.s. Thank you guys yesterday who tried cheering me up :] you guys r the bomb <3
p.p.p.s. Hey :] got new phone for like weeks since I killed my newish oldish one at the beach...anyway XD hit my up :] it's still the same numba &oh crap! something's wrong with my new phone! [say whattt??] It's just that, your numbers not in it :] haha so gimme some digits?
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